> I find myself really interested in the D/S thing and want
> to pick about your comments. I hope you don't mind!

Not at all. I'm hear for the discussion not just to hear myself blather on about gangbangs.

> Right, being able to take what one needs without
> regard for anything but one's own desire is intoxicating
> and euphoric.

It's not really about intoxication and euphoria...that is certainly a side benifit, but for me 'topping' or being dominant is about admitting to myself that it is ok to 'take' sexually (assuming the other person is cool with that) In other words topping does remove the shame from sex for me. It affirms the notion for me that it is ok to want sex and to demand it as a right/priveledge. In fact to demand it however I want it and not because I'm a 'good girl' or cuz I'm your wife or cuz I'm pretty or for any other reason that would somehow imply that I 'deserve' the privledge.


> But the dominant stuff is only fun because
> so often we can't get what we want or need, right?

I haven't found that to be the case.

> Because sex is not all that freely available in our
> society;

it isn't?

>> or in the case of the submissive role not having to ask for
>> what I want.

> But why shouldn't I be able to ask for exactly what I want?
Oh you certainly should be able to I'm not aruging with that.

> Why wouldn't I want to ask for exactly what I want?
Well....I suppose my particular kink in this area comes from being made to beg.

More specifically the fun that can be had when playing with the begging cenario

And the total sucktastrofy that comes from your partner turning the begging game into a sick mindfuck.

For me not having to ask means the other 'dominant' partner has spent extra special time thinking about just all of the delicous ways in which he/she wants to please me.

> This is what I say: make sex less shameful, get
> more sex happening, make it so that generally if
> you want sex you can get it, and then all the degradation
> and D/S stuff will fall off to the wayside, because I think
> it is a function of the scarcity of sex.

I'm curious as to why you have such a negative view of the 'D/S stuff' I certainly come from a BDSM background, but when I speak of dominant and submissive I am not nessecerily meaning that there is a D/S 'scene' going on. In fact I have been with several 'vanilla' partners where this dynamic was in play. For example....there is a room full of lesbian women all wearing strap ons and fucking the hell out of each other in a very dominant/masculine way. I would consider that D/S there is a dominant and submissive in each cenario they may no be calling each other that there may not be some cheezy negotiated or hurtfull scene, but the undercurrent is there. Certainly I don't think this cenario is about shame or degration either....

maybe also my lack of understanding stems from having such a fluid sexuality or allowing both male/female sexual gender roles a place with my D/S sides.

> (I'm just thinking aloud and I realize
> I may be wrong or a bit ignorant.)

No I think this is really important to talk about I certainly feel that in some respect gangbangs do have deep roots in shame and certainly sexual dysfunction, sexual preditory behavior, and sexual abuse stem from these problems/issues where BDSM is sometiems an outlet it doesn't neccecarily mean it's a positive outlet or healthy for society as a whole.

Anyway there's my 50 cents.

What's in it for her/me? As I will be attending my first gang bang, it's the experience...something new. As a sub, my particular gift is trying to fulfill fantasies. One tribester who will be coming back to the states for a visit would like a gang bang and orgy, so I am planning it for him, per my offer.

Am I nervous? Of course. I want to be successful in my endeavor and not suddenly withdrawal or back out. I want to experience the penetration of many different cocks and the power of satisfying many different men. Even though I am a sub and relinquish my body over to the dom of the moment, I still have power, which is the way it is suppose to be.

I am being selective in the men I am inviting, those I have met up with before in one way or another. I do know I need to be comfortable with most, if not all. I am considering wearing a blindfold to help keep me relaxed, but I won't know until that night (end of June, beginning of July).

Once the event is over, I'll be able to give you a different insight.

I hope this helps.